Looking for something to paint I saw these little salt shakers all lined up and thought, well that might be a nice challenge! Maybe do a series of other mundane objects all in a row. Going out now to look for ketchup bottles or spoons.
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Passing the time in Oakland by painting in various cafes and listening to people at nearby tables talk, to get a sense of the culture in the Bay Area. So far, I notice a greater acceptance of art as a living; concern for politics; environmental concerns filter into many conversations; food and exercise. Also people obey the signals at street corners: shocking since in Boston it is everyone for themselves dodging in front of traffic. NO, even at 6 am people patiently wait for the walk sign to cross the street even if no car is visible for miles! They look at me funny if I try to cross.
Looking for something to paint I saw these little salt shakers all lined up and thought, well that might be a nice challenge! Maybe do a series of other mundane objects all in a row. Going out now to look for ketchup bottles or spoons.
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3000 Miles traveled in 20 days! Uprooted my 35 year old art teaching business and now seeking to form new roots in the fertile soil of Oakland California. Rain has predominated these last few weeks, and the Californians are grateful for the end to the drought but apologetic to me, a newcomer, for the weather. Little do they know what I am comparing it to in my mind: the winter of hell in Boston! Sorry to all my old students in Boston! Now I have begun by painting each day in the local cafe. Listening in to the strangers talking near by to get a feel for the community. Not terribly different from Brookline, Massachusetts, but everyone is happier and in better health. Now on to seeking out my place in this new world!
.People, old and young, have said to me over the years: what was the name of that artist that cut off his ear? They are then treated to my lecture about how poor old Van Gough would probably not want to be remembered over time for this particular depressed act, but rather for a life time of hard work developing a new way to paint. This is part of my never ending effort to change popular perception of what being an artist, an what art, is all about. One person at a time, and hopefully at key teachable moments like when they ask questions. This led me also to think about how I would like to be remembered when I finally give up the ghost a couple of decades or so hence, I think I want someone to say something like this at my funeral. "She had a good start in life, then hit a lot of adverse circumstances in adult life. It took her a while but she finally began to learn from her challenges and gradually become an introspective person that learned humility from rejection, courage from setbacks, and patience with fate. She never gave up trying to convert people to her vision of how art figured into human experience, with some success." Some people will label me an artist, a creative person or an effective teacher. But I just hope I will end up looking back on my life and thinking: I sometimes turned lemons into lemonade and occasionally spun gold from straw. Paintings and also life events. Once someone told me to do something that scares me, every day. To help one overcome fears and grow. I can do it, but it takes concentration and planning. I must break down the steps, prepare for each one, then pause between steps for more courage. My twenty year old TV died and there was no helpful young man nearby to advise me. So I researched new TVs by myself, figured out what a Smart TV is (might free me from my cable bill) and selected one with good reviews. I drove to the Best Buy, handed the geeky young man the paper with the information, and he got me all set up with the right cable even though I did not quite understand his vocabulary. I had taken pictures of the back of my cable box and he showed me where to plug things in. I was prepared to stop at any moment and give up the entire pursuit, but somehow I was able to even carry the tv to my car myself and up three flights: the new tvs are one tenth the weight of my old giant box.
I took a break to gather my courage to set it up, knowing it would take patience. The set up manual has such small print, and extra information I do not want like "do not let children climb on TV". And the labels on the back of the TV are extremely hard to read. Eventually I figured out how to screw the top to the bottom: with impossible tiny screws meant to go down a long tube where I could not hold on to them. Delighting in my progress I almost didn't want to turn it on after I plugging things in. But low and behold the thing worked! I will wait until later to figure out how to make it go on wifi, It changed me to go through this process without panicking or calling my brother or son. I can go into the future with confidence that I may be able to solve problems on my own. But also, I am willing to fail without feeling bad about myself. I feel this is an important skill for aging. Knowing limitations but having courage to try things that seem daunting. They say old age is not for sissies, and I don't intend to be one. I am a better artist too because of it. Just like taking risks in painting gives me courage in my every day affairs, having courage in every day life opens me to try new painting challenges. I saw the teenagers standing in line by the high school, taking turns doing their drivers’ licence test. They looked scared and a little bit excited. Some people are so afraid of aging they don’t want to talk about it. They want to close their eyes and cover their ears and say “la la la” so as to keep out any information about the inevitable truth. I think it is because they do not have a licence to age yet. And that is because we don't have it yet. But we should. No one should be able to move forward until they study up and pass the aging test. Then they will be safe in society to age. The study manual would contain exact information on the realities of aging, so they can contain their fears appropriately. For example, people are afraid of rotting away in a substandard nursing home. But fewer than ten percent of the population does this, and even then, not for long. The manual will contain the many things one can do to mitigate the aging process, and even if they still do not exercise or stop smoking, at least they are doing it knowing the consequences, and in that have a measure of control over the seemingly uncontrollable future. The in class part of the study will have videos interviews of actual thriving elderly people, and why they are still viable and happy. Then the big “road” test. Aging candidates for licences to age will have to perform. After passing a quiz on the latest studies on combating Alzheimer's, financial forecasts for Social Security and Medicare benefits, and what to wear to the Apple bar for Genius appointments to solve tech problems, they will also have to drive a little too, so they can keep their drivers licences too. Information and courage are the goal. After all, aging is like driving in Boston: you are taking your life in your hands every time you go out. I am proud that I solved two perplexing tech problems yesterday that had been bothering me for a while. Some people over sixty either give up on technology and refuse to do more than email - if that. I understand. Tech problems are mind boggling since our brains were not raised during the computer generation. We have to translate everything into what we do understand, and even then, we are never quite fluent in computerese. Yet technology has great potential for the elderly in keeping their brains active and preventing isolation. In the next twenty years or so, technology will also overcome some of the handicaps of the elderly such as the wonderful new app on iphones that enhances hearing aids. I willingly devote hours a week to getting better at tech. I learn new tools such as googling my questions and getting lots of nerd websites that will happily assist me in such issues as “how to I get my songs from my computer to my phone?” Whenever I am around a young person I ask them to teach me ONE, only one, new trick about how to use my phone. Setting alarms and reminders is great for keeping me from missing important appointments and meeting deadlines. As a creative tool, I cannot do without computers. With two websites and other internet personas I control what comes up on a google search of my name, to help my professional side. I use graphic tools all the time to help my painting process, such as reframing and adjusting the color of photos I took to prepare them for painting. What I have learned is that you need great patience and creative thinking to solve those baffling tech questions. Yesterday I finally found the audiobooks I had downloaded in a file, not named audiobooks, by experimenting and poking around on the app. I also successfully transferred a book from the library to my ipad for an airplane ride by finally realizing I needed to upgrade my software. I am losing my fear of technology a bit at a time. Humility and perseverance as well and thoughtful reflection on creative approaches to a problem help. So does having kids that will answer questions if all else fails. Although I am trying not to be that stereotype old parent whose digital clocks are always flashing 12:00, or sending hilarious auto-corrected texts At dinner the other night my friend Martha said she wanted to Rebrand herself, and word used in popular culture these days. With further discussion, I found we were on the same page in figuring out what we had to offer the world in later life, and how to market it in a way that we could be occupied and financially sustained for a good long time.
This breaks me out of thinking I would just continue doing what I do now, only fewer hours and with less energy. It keeps me from thinking I will have to be a greeter at Wal-Mart or flip burgers like I did at age 18 to pay for my Depends and Oradent. We were admitting to ourselves and each other that there is something valuable we have to offer the world, but that the world needs to be convinced of it. Putting a spin on our experience and expertise that looks to the world like the answer to a problem is what we mean by Rebrand. Do we have to hire a media consultant, an agent, and a marketer to do this since we are not experts in any of those fields? Or, might our very experience of winning many battles, solving many problems, and overcoming many losses in our lives be enough to trigger a process that, yes, might need some help from others, but with us at the control board? A combination of humility about learning new things without shame that we don't already know everything, with flexibility and no fear of failure could be the answer. Are we not by this age good at learning quickly from our mistakes? A bunch of re words come to mind: Rethink. Reframe. Reassess, and then, Rebrand. Being in a community of others trying to do the same thing might make it all fun and adventuresome.
http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2015/07/old-people-are-cool/395249/?utm_source=SFFB
So maybe there is a trend about to happen? Given that the baby boomer generation is a large group, and may still be financially viable to the business world, maybe old will be the new hip. So says this article in the Atlantic. Well, I’m jumping on board. This coming spring I will produce a fashion show for the older crowd, with local boutiques competing for the best, coolest and most stylish outfit on the 60 plus models. We will have a hat contest in which children show hats they made for their grandmas. It should all be a lot of fun. A video will run on youtube, and part of the display will be my ten paintings of flowers, just past their full bloom, but still lovely. Like that scene with Kathy Bates in Fried Green Tomatoes, in which she gets back at the young girls who steal her parking place, the upcoming seniors will defy the notion that you have to be young to be gorgeous. |
Wendy Soneson
Creative late life planning: using art and creativity to live joyfully. Archives
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